Ramblings of an Old, Romantic Soul

  My goddaughter gave me this mug on my 60th birthday. Every morning it reminds me that no matter how I feel, I am these very things - strong and beautiful. Thank you, Petunia. This is dedicated to all the women in my life. To my Mom, Carmella, who is still going at 90 years. Her body and mind are beginning to fail, but what a life she has lived! To my strong, beautiful sisters, Mary Jo, Kate, Suzie, Karen, Joycie - every one of them have gone through trials and tribulations, yet they remain strong and beautiful. They have been put through the fire and have come out scarred, but whole. Resilient.  To my decesased grandmothers, Josephine and Dorothy, who I never knew.  Both strong and beautiful in so many ways. Both had to deal with struggles and heartache and both died far too young.  To my aunts, nieces, cousins, friends. So many women who wake up every morning and go about their business. Taking care of families, jobs, life - the backbone and support for husbands/c...

  To quote Michael Buble - 'It's a new day, it's a new dawn, and I'm feeling good." What a difference a night makes. That, and a good venting via the written word.  Journaling/blogging is therapeutic for me.  Writng is a good way to get the anger, frustration, hurt, whatever it is I am feeling - out of my system. Then the light becomes brighter.  The tears dry up. And a smile returns. There is a song we sang in church 'But then comes the morning, yesterday's sorrows behind. Wake it's the day of your longing; life returns, mercy comes, it's morning."  So true. So true. I knew this journey would be a roller coaster of emotions. Some days are good, some not so much. Some days I can handle whatever comes our way, other days not so much.  And that's okay.  Mom doesn't see the discombobulated me; I keep it from her. Hence the blog. Again, great release. Really great. (sound like anyone we know?!)  Mr. Henley, if you please  Today Mom is doing...

  Today is a bad day.  Have you ever felt a loss for something you never had?  A paralyzing sadness has washed over me. There are things I should be doing, and yet all I can do is sit. Perhaps writing will help alleviate the melancholy.  We have plans to go away for a week. My youngest sister, Karen, will be here to care for Mom.  Mom has had a rough couple of days due to an infection/medication. Last night she was up several times, so today is she a bit confused and sleepy.  As much as I need this getaway, I am concerned that caring for Mom alone may be a bit overwhelming for my sister.  Though I do most of her personal care, Terry is here in the evening to cook dinner, clean up, and provide emotional support.  Mom has been asking if I think Karen can handle everything. Mom is concerned about her 'baby' doing some of the things I do.  Karen has spoken with Mom, I have spoken with Mom to console her and let her know everything will be okay. N...

We have decided to create a memory book of Mom’s life. She is 90 years old now and retention of current events is dwindling, however, she remembers her past quite well.  We asked family to submit questions. I then video Mom's responses. One of the questions this morning was 'what is your favorite memory of your dad, our grandfather'.  My grandfather was tragically killed in a coal mining accident when Mom was a senior in high school - 1947, 73 years ago.  Her response was so poignant - so much emotion, as if he had passed away yesterday. I had to stop recording for her to regain composure. Again, it made me realize that she may not remember her pills, or if she had breakfast, but she certainly remembers what happened 73 years ago.  Today's events are distant, but yesteryear's happenings are very real. How blessed am I to be the one recording such precious and cherished memories. 

  Forget Donald Trump and Joe Biden. That debate doesn't hold a candle to the debates in our home -  Terry vs Kristina, with Carmella as moderator 😄 Makes for very lively 'discussions'. On one side is Terry, my dearest love.  He does NOT like Trump, thinks he is evil and dumb. I tell him over and over this is not the case.  Evil is a very strong word, and like him or not, Donald Trump is not dumb.  According to Terry, the President has done nothing for the country - at all. Well, correction, he has caused divisivness, hatred, and anything else bad happening in the world.  'Tis very frustrating.  On the other side is me.  I do NOT like Biden. I think he is dumb and useless. And Terry cannot argue those points.  He will vote for a simpleton (harsh, I know) just to NOT vote for Trump.  I am not enamoured with our President - far from it.  He irritates the hell out of me at times, and I think he often has diaharea of the mouth. He spea...