Sunday, May 9, 2010

Mother's Day

Today is the day set aside to honor all mothers.  It is the day we call to mind that woman who raised us, who sacrificed for us, who kissed our booboos and made us feel better.  As I grow older, I realize how much my own Mom sacrificed for me and my six siblings...I am amazed at how much she did, every day, and how much she continues to do now.  She is a role model for what a wife and mother should be.  Is she perfect?  Hell no, but she would do anything for her children and she loves us all unconditionally.  I love her and am proud to call her Mom.  I cherish every day I have with her.

But this day is bittersweet for me.  I am happy for my sisters, my friends, my family...to all those who have this day to celebrate.  I only wish I could celebrate as a mother.  For as long as I remember, my dream was to be a Mommy -I wanted lots of children.  As I got older, I knew the 'many' wouldn't happen, but I truly believed I would have at least one or two, twins perhaps.  It never happened.  My husband and I married late, and we were never able to conceive.  I have come to terms with my barren uterus.  I have come to terms that I will never have a child call me 'Mommy' and look at me with unconditional love.  Yet, there are days, such as today, when sadness overwhelms me.  Or when I see a commercial of a mother and child, my heart still aches. I know I am loved by nieces, I know I am a mother figure to some, but it isn't the same.  They are not my own, they did not come from my loins.

My hope for all mothers on this day is that you realize how lucky and fortunate you are.  Although your children may not be perfect, they are a gift to be cherished.  As hard as motherhood may be, count your blessings and know your work, your love, is not in vain.

I do know I am blessed.  I was blessed with a wonderful, kind, loving husband.  I have two beautiful 'baby girls' (my cats)...I have a good life.  We don't always understand why life takes us down the roads it does, we can only get in the driver's seat and make the best of it.  Life is good.

So, to all my mother friends and family - I hope you have a wonderful day...relish in all the love that is thrown your way and count each and every blessing.

3 comments:

  1. OMGosh...I thought I was reading something from a newspaper and realized as I read further that it was my own sister writing this. I love you and feel for you on this day knowing how much children mean to you...I was just telling Tara this very day what an old romantic soul you are and here you go an post this....I said to her that there is only one Kristina in this world - I love You...Sis

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  2. Kristina, I feel your pain. I have 2 step-kids and a (step) grandson, but I have had to give up my dream of being a mom as well. I thought I would have a big family too; but it didn't happen for Jerry and me. I get a bit of respite knowing that I am spiritual mom to some. But all I can do is offer up my suffering as Jesus did. It hurts like hell. Thanks for being vulnerable enough to share this. Love,Anne

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  3. Krissy, that is truly beautiful. I am glad that I am reading it after Mother's Day, I had to stop from time to time to wipe my tears. It has touched me in such a comforting way. You are awesome. All I wanted to be when I grew up was a Mom, just as wonderful as the one I have. God has a master plan for all of us, but it is not always easy to accept.
    As you I am blessed with great nieces and nephews, but they are not mine. I have my "Maggie" and what a awesome comfort she is. She gets great Mothers Day cards too.
    Father's Day can get to Bob too. We both feel that together we would of made really good parents. But we are blessed with each other and the deep love that we feel for the other. He is an awesome man and God has blessed me with a wonderful husband.(Finally !) Love you cuz and thanks for your writting.

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